Flavio and the President

"Flavio"

Earlier this week, Flavio of El Prado, who was cleaning up a Richardson doo-doo at the Roundhouse, got an invitation from the Big Fella. “Let’s go Flav, the Prez needs us.”

Obama and Richardson

Flavio reports that the President asked Gov. Bill to speak with him in the Oval Office about the North Koreans: Kim Jong-il’s pot-shot at a South Korean corvette, killing 46 sailors. While “Barry and Billy are sweethearts” played in the background, Flavio said Richardson advised the President on Korean protocol. “The Koreans don’t like Hilary and Hilary don’t like me,” said Bill. “But I’ll go to Pyongyang if you ask.”

“President Obama is trying to keep the Clintons out the loop,” said Flavio. “There’s bad blood ‘cause Bill endorsed Barack.”

After Richardson left, Flavio said he was picking up glasses and wiping off the President’s desk. “He paces all the time. No wonder he’s so skinny. He asked me what I thought about Richardson’s pay-to-play troubles.”

“I blame Manny (Aragon) for leading him down the wrong way,” said the loyal Flavio. “Now Manny’s got free room and board up their in Canon City at the Supermax.”

“I like Bill,” said Obama. “He’s a rascal, reminds me of a Chicago Pol—like Blago–but way smarter, though not as smart as Dick Daley.”

“You’re the one with troubles, Mr. President: the Gulf, Gaza, the steppes and the stans.”

“You got that right. I asked Michelle, whoever heard of Kyrgyzstan? And we went to college. Now they want our help. I don’t need more bandits–like the Karzais in Kabul—screwing up my plans.”

“Mr. President, you need fresh publicity.”

Alvin Greene

“I need new ideas, Flavio. I like change for its own sake.”

“Mr. President, get yourself away from the white sand on the Gulf. Make a movida among your own people.”

“I got a kick out of Alvin Greene’s win in South Carolina but hey, I’m not going near him. He’s the wrong Al Green.”

Desmond Tutu

Nelson Mandela

“Go to the World Cup finals in J’burg, South Africa, Mr. President. Visit with real heroes—President Mandela and Bishop Tutu. Think of the headlines: Son of Africa Returns to honor Patriarchs. The world cup is bigger than the Superbowl or Final Four.”

“But there’s a security risk. I’m not sure how popular I am. They might boo.”

Muhammad Ali

“Take the most famous man in the world withyou, Muhammad Ali. They remember the Rumble in the Jungle. By the time, they get done screaming, “Ali boomaye, Ali boomaye,” you won’t hear las vuvuzelas.”

“I watched “When We Were Kings” 105 times during the campaign. Michelle gave my copy away.”

“Mr. President, the friend of your friend is still your friend. Everybody wants to be Muhammad Ali’s friend. He’s the greatest of all time.”

“How would you like to come to work for me, Flavio?”

“New Mexico needs me, Mr. President. I ain’t no carpetbagger. I’m a sweeper.”

Editor’s Note: On Wednesday, the Taos Municipal Schools will discuss the state auditor’s report with a representative. Flavio snapped the candid below of board president, the purported Lorraine Coca-Ruiz in deep conversation with Banderas as they plotted strategy. “Where have all the Crab Cats gone, long time passing?”

"What is your plan?"